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Author Interview
Interview with Deborah Spaide Author of Teaching Your Kids To Care Founder of Kids Care Clubs and FamilyCares. By Diane Siepina Q. Why did you feel it was necessary to write this book? A. In a world that emphasizes accumulation values, Jim and I felt strongly that we wanted our five children to grow up with a commitment to what they could give the world, not what they could get. We soon discovered that it was hard work to find meaningful opportunities for our family to volunteer together. Many organizations did not want children to participate for various reasons,legal and practical. So we made our own opportunities and we were convinced that many other parents with similar goals might benefit from what we had learned. Q. Why do children have to be taught to care? Doesn't that instinct come naturally? A. Yes. The instinct for charity is innate. We are all born with the natural need to help, rescue, and contribute to our world. What is missing is the opportunity to develop this instinct through exercise. Charity is like any muscle it has to be stretched, challenged and worked in order to grow stronger. Q. Is it important that children get involved with hands-on caring projects or can they learn these values by watching and listening to others? A. Many family charity projects do not require much time and most can be done at home in between soccer games or chores. So the time issue really doesn't have to be an obstacle. But even if it was, there is no better way for busy parents to spend quality time with their children than to engage in a charity project that give them the chance to share a common goal, work together as a team and create memories that will feed their children's self-image for years to come. Q. What advice do you have for parents especially working couples or single parents with limited time who want to nurture caring kids? A. Many family charity projects do not require much time and most can be done at home in between soccer games or chores. So the time issue really doesn't have to be an obstacle. But even if it was, there is no better way for busy parents to spend quality time with their children than to engage in a charity project that gives them the chance to share a common goal, work together as a team and create memories that will feed their children's self-image for years to come. Q. What roles can grandparents or other adults play to help children develop good values? A. Family charity projects often include grandparents or other adults that are important in a child's life. Grandparents have so much to share in the way of experience, wisdom and family history. Grandparents who don't live close to their grandchildren can still play an important role by reinforcing the compassion efforts of the children with congratulation cards, encouraging phone calls and letters in which they share their own experiences with caring and serving others. Q. Are you confident that future generations will develop into compassionate adults (despite the negative messages they experience through video games, television and other media)? A. I do have confidence in the strength of compassion in our children. I am also concerned, as many parents are, about the escalating violence we see in even very young children. I don't pretend to know the reasons for tragedies like Littleton, Colorado. What I do believe is that developing proactive compassion in our children is a natural inoculation against hurtful, hateful and violent behavior. Q. Often families don't even know how to volunteer. How can they get involved in charity? A. We recently started a new online program for families to help them do just that. The program is called FamilyCares and it provides parents, grandparents and kids with easy and inexpensive projects they can do together. Families can register free there are no costs associated with membership. The site is located at familycares.org. |