Trudy Krisher's book Kathy's Hats tells the story of Kathy, a little girl coping with cancer. The book follows Kathy through her diagnosis, her treatment, and her recovery — including her hair loss from chemotherapy, which inspires her hat collection and the title of the book. Whether your family wants to volunteer with cancer patients or you have a member of the family struggling with the illness, or even if you just want to teach your children more about illness and recovery, Kathy's Hats is a cancer story with hope and a happy ending.
How did writing the book help you and your family cope with Kathy's illness?
The book became a way of “giving back” to all the people who helped us. People babysat my other children, brought casseroles, and helped in many thoughtful ways. This was my way of saying “thank you.”
When Kathy was in the hospital, how did she occupy her time while she was recovering from treatments?
Kathy was usually sick…throwing up, tired, etc. But she did like videos. At home and at the hospital, she became interested in musicals. We watched “Annie,” “My Fair Lady,” and other musicals over and over again. She came to learn the words and music by heart.
Did volunteers visit Kathy when she was sick? If so, how did they help?
Volunteers from the Child Life area sometimes visited. But it was kind of hit-or-miss. If they were available, Kathy was sick. Or if she was feeling better they weren't available.
In your author's note, you mention that Kathy's siblings had a hard time coping with the attention Kathy was getting. What could volunteers do to help make things easier for brothers and sisters of young cancer patients?
I think a support group for siblings [would help]. Kathy got tremendous amounts of attention, naturally. But her brother and sister needed attention, too, and they were often scared and anxious.
Have you heard stories from family whose children have had cancer who were helped by your book? What sorts of things have they said?
This book has helped many people. I get calls or e-mails from absolute strangers who are thrilled to have found something that can help them cope when they are feeling so desperate.
One woman called from the state of Washington. Her daughter was having brain surgery and hadn't realized that her hair would be shaved off and used the story to comfort her child. Recently a woman from Cleveland e-mailed both Kathy and me about her very young child who had cancer. A women's group from New Jersey used the book as a fundraiser for children with cancer. Schools have me come to read the story and they have “hat days.”
What I hear over and over is that the positive message and the cheerful topic of hats helps people face this frightening subject. My dream is to develop a program with school nurses so that they can take the book into classrooms where a child has been recently diagnosed in order to help the child's “friends” know how to respond and understand what is needed.
Does your family do any volunteering together? Do you help out with young cancer patients?
My children are older now – they are in their 20s – but when Kathy had cancer, we started the Candlelighters' Kids Club at Children's Medical Center in Dayton. The club is ongoing today. The book Kathy's Hats is dedicated to some of those kids in the original club.
What can children do to support children with life-threatening illnesses?
Children can just be themselves! They need to remember that a child with cancer is still a child – they need laughter, friendship, and support – just as they always did. It's best for them to still keep on being friends and not let fear get in the way.
How is Kathy doing now? How has her life been changed by her experiences?
Kathy is now 26 years old and an attorney with a law firm in Columbus, Ohio. Amazing! I am going to send this question to her with hopes she can answer it for herself.
Kathy's answer:
“I am doing very well. Struggling with cancer is a life experience that shaped me into the person I am today. I can honestly say how thankful I am for the experience and the love and support that came from my family and friends. Facing death often gives you a different outlook on life. Challenges, such as having cancer, force you to go through a range of emotions that help to develop your sensitivities as a person. I think I have a deep awareness of the world around me and an appreciation and sensitivity to all of life's experiences.”
FamilyCares thanks Trudy Krishner and Kathy for their time and sharing their personal experiences through the hopeful story of Kathy's Hats.
This interview was conducted by email in April 2006.
Abbey Kos.
